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A recent BBC headline states: “School transforms behaviour with compassionate approach”. It was a relief to read the article that followed as it described a school that had modified its strict behavioural policy in response to some students’ needs.
In a climate where more and more schools are taking a stricter approach to behaviour, this flexibility recognises the broader picture and the need to show compassion.
A student, whose behaviour improved under the guidance of behaviour expert, Marie Gentles, said: “She helped me just calm down and just listen. She listened to me…”; and the key word here is most certainly “listen”. Having created a wellbeing programme in three different schools, I have learnt that when people feel heard and understood, that is when we truly begin to prioritise wellbeing. We simply need to listen.
Listen to data
Every context is different, and needs within a school are constantly changing, so listening to data about wellbeing is fundamental. We already know that happier children learn better (watch Can School Make You Happier? if you need some evidence) but what is it that the pupils in your school need?
“Needs within a school are constantly changing.”
In September, I started in a new school as wellbeing and positive education leader at Rome International School, Globeducate group, and one of the first tasks of our Wellbeing Team was to send out a Wellbeing Survey to pupils from Years 2 to 13. Analysis of the data by a team of twelve staff volunteers from across the school, gave us the chance to identify what those needs were and to plan our next steps. Some were quick fixes that we could implement straight away; some we are working on gradually and progressively; and some we have put in the development plan for next year. But the key is that we are listening.
Here are a few practical examples of what that has looked like:
Physical and emotional safety
Pupils need to feel safe. Our data showed that not enough of them felt that “pupils treat each other well’. Having talked to pupils, teachers and the wellbeing team (informal chats are, of course, another crucial way to listen), a trend emerged of pupils not respecting one another’s boundaries.
In the playground, this might have been rough play with primary children; whilst for teenagers it was often related to language and banter that had gone too far. In response, we held a primary assembly in which Year 6 children enacted others over-stepping both physical and emotional boundaries and then shared the “That’s a Boundary” song to reinforce the message (be warned, you will be singing it in your sleep!).
“Pupils need to feel safe.”
With our Year 10s, where banter had gone a step too far on too many occasions, we held wellbeing sessions in which pupils used the “Bantometer” to identify theirs, and others’, lines of acceptance. It was a great tool for initiating a discussion about the line between banter and bullying and, crucially, ensuring they were truly listening to one another.
Emotional regulation
Pupils need to know how to manage their emotions and less than half of our pupils showed in the data that they felt confident using coping strategies. Teaching, sharing, and modelling coping strategies is central to any wellbeing programme and this reinforced just how important it is.
“Not enough pupils knew who they could speak to if they were struggling.”
Listening to this data has meant sharing a weekly wellbeing strategy with all staff, encouraging them to practise it regularly with pupils; leading assemblies and wellbeing sessions that share a range of strategies and remind pupils to try them all, and then decide what works best for them; and having our secondary school wellbeing ambassadors lead mini wellbeing workshops with younger children.
On Monday, my Year 6 class were asked to make a cube that had a purpose. The fact that three of them chose to draw wellbeing strategies on each face was one of those wonderful moments of teacher realisation that the message is getting through!
Sharing emotions
Talking about emotions is important and our data showed that not enough pupils knew who they could speak to if they were struggling. We had one hundred and fifty new pupils last year so that was a factor, but we knew this was something that had to be addressed straight away. Within a few weeks, ten members of staff had volunteered to be mentors when needed; a Listening Centre was available for pupils every break-time; and weekly “Walk and Talk” sessions were available to those who needed it, in addition to the counsellor who was already in place. Even more importantly, staff training focused on the need for all staff to actively listen to pupils and their needs.
“It takes time to develop a programme that truly places wellbeing at the heart of a school.”
Following a “We Are Listening” secondary school assembly, in which we shared this data and how we were responding, one pupil told her mother: “It’s amazing mum. They asked us all those questions and they are actually doing something. I can’t believe they’re listening.”
It takes time to develop a programme that truly places wellbeing and compassion at the heart of a school, but it is achievable and I have no doubt that listening is the best possible way to approach it.
For more expert insights, free resources, and wellbeing products for teachers around the world, explore the Wellbeing Hub from Oxford University Press and make a difference in your school today.