Angie Lezar is matron at St Mary’s School, Cambridge. St Mary’s has recently been named in Fortune magazine’s list of the top 250 boarding schools in the world.
Angie was originally a teacher in her native South Africa for 27 years. However, on moving to Britain she re-directed her career into life coaching and studying whilst working as a companion to an elderly lady.
She eventually set up her own life-coaching business but it struggled because of the pandemic. And then Angie’s niece, who had been a pupil at St Mary’s, encouraged her to look for a job with the school.
A year ago, Angie applied for the job as one of the school matrons, and found her niche. Here, writer and commentator Zoe MacDougall chats to Angie about her work.
Priorities
In her pastoral role as one of five school matrons at St Mary’s School, Cambridge, Angie Lezar has two clear priorities: to form a loving relationship with the girls and to help them get to where they want to be in life.
As Angie says: “My whole purpose is to help people to achieve their potential. To be a part of helping the girls to figure out what they want in life and then encouraging them to go for it – what could be nicer?
“My whole purpose is to help people to achieve their potential.”
“The girls are diligent, determined and ambitious – and many of them want to be surgeons or economists. There’s a whole vibe here of learning and excitement and love and life: the energy is so inspiring. It’s a privilege to work with these girls. To know that I have been a part of their early lives is a joy”.
School mum
Four o’clock is a special time in Angie’s day. Just over 80 boarders are making their way home to Mary Ward House, a ten-minute walk from school. Angie is at reception to welcome them. The girls come in, individually or in groups and pairs, their cheeks flushed from their walk.
The younger girls are excited, eager to download their experiences of work and play as they sign in with her. Angie can see from their faces what kind of a day they’ve had. Perhaps older girls have had a test, or a sports fixture, or a particularly heavy day of lessons. This special time of day is Angie’s opportunity to check in with each of the girls before they continue up to their rooms or to the dining hall for a cup of tea and a snack.
“Angie identifies an ability to connect with the girls as her biggest strength.”
Angie describes her role as “like a mother”. For many of the girls, their real mums are on the other side of the world and, as boarders at St Mary’s, they are living in a strange country, learning in a foreign language, and adapting to an unfamiliar schooling system. So Angie thinks they need a “school mum”.
Angie’s interaction with the girls is what she loves most about her job. She identifies an ability to connect with the girls as her biggest strength: “I don’t like admin, or telling people what to do – just let me bond with you.” Angie recognises that girls learn best when they feel secure and comfortable and that’s the atmosphere she aims to create at Mary Ward House.
Technology
Managing teenagers’ access to the internet is easier at school than it is at home. Whilst the girls are allowed to use What’s App and TikTok in Mary Ward House, there is education-level firewall security in the boarding house – as well as in the main school buildings – so a lot of unregulated material on the internet can’t be accessed. All technology is handed in overnight. Phone calls have to be made in a public place, such as on the sofa in the quiet but open reception area.
A light touch
The staff are vigilant, checking on the girls in their bedrooms mid-evening. Realistically, however, things don’t always go to plan. Angie recalls hearing three girls and a boy’s voice on a phone call in a bedroom. Sensitively, she kept her disciplinary measures light – “if the rules are too tight, teenagers have a habit of finding a loophole and going underground”. But the incident was shared with the pastoral team, and a senior member of staff followed up with those involved.
How to handle misdemeanours and mistakes without alienating teenagers by coming down too heavily on them is a dilemma many parents grapple with on a daily basis. Tidiness, for instance, can be an hourly challenge at home. Interestingly, in the hands of the professionals, this simply isn’t an issue. Some of the girls’ rooms are very neat and tidy; others less so. The policy in the dorms is relaxed and there are no repercussions for scattered belongings – except that, if the cleaner can’t see the floor the room doesn’t get cleaned! Matrons sometimes say “Please pick this up” – but nagging about tidiness isn’t part of their relationship with the girls.
“If the rules are too tight, teenagers have a habit of finding a loophole and going underground.”
Encouraging healthy eating is a further example of the merits of putting children in the hands of the professionals. Girls have to come down and eat at meal times – although Friday and Saturday are more relaxed – and the matrons at St Mary’s are extremely vigilant in the dining hall: “We dish up for all girls in years 5-11, so we see exactly what goes on their plates. Then one of us might say to another, this is the second day in a row that one girl has only had soup, for example. Then they’re on our radar.
“When we’re serving food, we’re also watching the girls and we can see if someone actually doesn’t eat that much. We remember who did what, who likes what and we get to know them very well. Any food concerns are then flagged up with the senior matron, the head of boarding or the school nurse.”
A verbal relationship
Forming a warm, motherly relationship with the girls, whilst observing the strict safeguarding boundaries, requires real skill. The school operates a “no touch” policy, so relationships between staff and pupils have to be verbal – and can’t rely on using endearments, which are deemed inappropriate.
“Laughter and teasing indicate a level of affection, of feeling comfortable in a relationship.”
Angie acknowledges that, in her native South Africa, “people are more used to touch, so it’s been difficult to learn not to do that.” But safeguarding is of paramount importance here, and rules need to be followed. So Angie loves to banter with the girls, as she feels that “laughter and teasing indicates a level of affection, of feeling comfortable in a relationship.”
Identifying Vulnerabilities
The special position held by a matron in a boarding house allows them to notice things that, perhaps, other staff don’t see. As Angie acknowledges, “matrons get to see all the nitty-gritty of the girls’ lives.” Sometimes, a girl will withdraw into herself; she may be less chatty over the supper table, or spend more time in her room.
Angie explains: “In the formal classroom, where a certain type of behaviour is expected, there is less room for deviation from the norm, whereas in the boarding house there is more personal space. Sometimes the girls walk in and I can see from their faces that they have had a hard day, or they have a headache. I can just see it.”
She says: “Be open-minded, listen, don’t make assumptions about any individual, and be ready to support those who are less socially comfortable than others.”
Teamwork
Matrons at St Mary’s liaise closely with academic staff. Angie explains: “Sometimes a girl hasn’t performed appropriately in a test, and that could be driven by an emotional issue. Or a girl may not be sleeping well and her tiredness in class is noticed by her teachers and that becomes a conversation between academic and boarding staff.
“We try and step in as soon as possible where there’s a problem.”
“Or if a girl is mis-behaving in assembly we will be alerted because there could be an underlying cause for concern. There’s a lot of monitoring, a lot of crossovers. And we try and step in as soon as possible where there’s a problem.. We’d rather make sure there is nothing to worry about rather than assume it’s nothing and then discover we should have been more concerned.
“Even if a girl tells us ‘it’s nothing’, they know that we’re on the alert, so it’s easier for them to come back to us and maybe raise the topic concerning them. Sometimes if it’s a negative thing they’re getting into, they realise we’ve noticed and that can be enough to encourage them to change tack.
“Everyone is very good at liaising and comparing notes as a team. Sometimes you might think your evidence is just a flash in the pan, but everyone’s little pieces of evidence can add up to a whole picture of a girl’s well-being. We’re all on it, we all work together.”
Supporting school leavers
Having been so well cared for at school, it can be hard for the girls to leave at the end of Year 13. Angie has been instrumental in setting up an “out-duction” programme for school leavers, Year 13 girls have enjoyed a self defence workshop, a talk from police about personal safety, a talk from HSBC about credit rating and budgeting, a sexual health and well-being talk and a talk about interview techniques, CVs and application letters.
The final “out-duction” talk in the 2022 programme, was on social and mental health and was given by Angie herself, drawing on her life-coach training and qualifications.
Unsung Heroes
Boxing Angie’s role – or that of any matron – into a job description would be a challenge for any HR department. Perhaps even Angie would be hard-pushed to define how much she contributes to school life. For sure, matrons are very often the unsung heroes of school life who keep children safe and happy, ready to learn and play to their full potential in a boarding-school environment.
This article is from the latest print edition of Independent School Management Plus magazine, out soon.